zensqueeze (zensqueeze) wrote,

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The "Ideal Self" and the Gift

I spent three hours talking with a co-worker today. She was able to provide her perspective on the agency I work for. Her perspective allowed me to evaluate my own perspective of the agency. And more important than that, it allowed me to feel accepted and appreciated by someone in the agency. Since I don’t have a supervisor, I am really left without knowing how I am doing as an employee. I believe I am doing the best I know how to do, but sometime you like, or even needed, someone to tell you how they perceive what you are doing. In a lot of ways that volunteer that was directing his anger at me helped me out a lot. He made me focus on myself and how I was functioning. That particular volunteer re-energized my personal ethic.

After work James, Mavis, Lauren, and I went out to dinner and watched a DVD together. Normally he can be hard for me to be fully energized to be social after work. But, now that I am taking more time for myself, I have more energy and more “life”. By life, I mean, I feel as if I more spirit, wisdom…I am more of what I few as my “ideal” self.

P.S. that is “ideal” self always changes. As soon as I achieve one idea of my ideal self more things get added onto that self. I am starting to actualize the theory that it is not the result it is the process that is the reward.

Peace be with,
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